Over the past few months, I’ve had the opportunity to meet and get to know some beautiful women. I had an opportunity to connect with them on a level that is different than most girl-friend relationships and it was such a nice change of pace.Just before our last hurrah of He’s Alive, I overheard a paraphrased quote spoken by one of these beauties and I knew in an instant that I needed to write it down so I could share it here with YOU. I feel its message is what every SINGLE woman needs to know in order to overcome the struggles of the solo journey.
In today’s society, if you reach college and don’t have a bit of bling on your finger, people begin to subconsciously view you in a different sort of light. Even without intent, people will begin an inner monologue on the reasoning of your current relationship status.
They may consider you to be stuck up, too conservative, a control freak, a religious nut, or they may think that there’s something else hidden behind a facade that the guys that you have dated have run from and never looked back. Pretty sad that a naked finger can cause such a critical analysis of an individual, isn’t it?Unfortunately the analysis only becomes more brutal with age.
No wonder so many women run into any open set of arms that will let them. No wonder our self esteem is shot and we turn to other forms of approval, often those that will only tear us down further, in order to feel worthy and that we’re good enough.
But I’m here today to share with you a message that can change all of that. One that can change the way that you view yourself, and with time, can hopefully eliminate the unwanted analysis society performs.
The paraphrased quote that brought this message to you was this…
Ladies, have you become so obsessed with getting a ring on your finger that you’ve forgotten about the nails that pierced Christ’s hands for you?
Makes you stop and think, doesn’t it? If you’re not quite sure what it means…don’t worry, the spoken word poem by Jackie Hill (below) will share more insight. Or you’re welcome to email me so we can chat.You can watch the video and/or read along with the transcription that I’ve provided below. Soak in the words. Watch it or read it again. Let the words fill you with the strength that you’ve been searching for.
“I find it funny that women, women that are children of the Most High, continue to fall for low lives, chasing after men that have yet to find a maturity as quick as they can find a help me, please. Help me understand. I stand on the side lines watching my sisters, who have hearts like pillows with an addiction to the relationships and allergic reactions to loneliness, turn men into cocaine, dying to be strung out on love even if separation from their true Rock is a result.His hug could be their rehab. His wisdom would rescue them from relapses, but this Winehouse mentally got them so drunk on denial that they could care less that God actually knows what’s best. So they push Him to the side and let the god of flesh make decisions for them.
Women, your impatience with sovereignty has carved your eyesight into an Eden of illusions; seeing a supposed godliness in any and every Adam who walks past, blinded to the worms swimming through his fruit. The lust. Playing hide and go seek in his praise, a symphony of pride; resting in his swag. If his walk ain’t like your Heavenly Dad, then run.
A man, that is yet to learn how to be led by the spirit of God, cannot lead you to anywhere but himself. Which would be cool, if your boo was the source of all comfort, a stronghold of peace, and ocean of healing, and a galaxy of love. With the power to turn dust into us in a split second, but only God has that written on his resume.
And how many of you have fired the same God for a counterfeit Savior? Disregarding the quaffs that was on God’s back, to fix your eyes on that wooden crucifix hanging a mirror man’s neck; so desperate for a ring of metal to melt onto your hand that you have forgotten the nails crawling with wrath that was smashed into His Jesus. Or a crown mangled into thorns but our confused queens have mistaken princes for the King of Jews. He was hung up for you, so hang up on dude; I’m telling you.
If your search for love has stolen your reverence for God, you have made a modern-day Baal out of a relationship, a diamond ring into a golden calf, a god out of a man who has to borrow his breath from someone else. I suggest you steal back your heart, from whatever man that has it sitting on the same table he plays spades with. Empty and all, beating with tears, go back to the one that is jealous for you and say, “Here, you can have it. I’m sorry for giving something you created away to someone you created, believing they would do better with it than You”.And I stand here before you as one who has stood face to face with Satan’s razor blades that he grazes with us women. He’s working hard to distract our gaze of faith off of the lover of our soul, so much that we rather court than get to know the judge. But I’m standing before you as one who is striving to present her loneliness as a gift to the Healer of broken hearts; believing He will make a Lazarus of my pain, a walking miracle of my past. I am suspending all that the world has taught me all about relationships to truly believe that everything is only found in men. But everything is only found in Him.
I’m letting this pillow of a heart find comfort in Jesus, believing that He loves me unconditionally, eternally and perfectly.
So women, when your imagination tries to tell you that that guy will be your hero, remind yourself that Jesus is the only man that can save you.